To be honest, I've had this idea for a year, but I battled myself for months, going back and forth between self-doubt, fear of judgement, and just saying "fuck it, go for it girl". The "fuck it" finally prevailed and here we are! It's definitely been a journey. The last two years have been full of personal healing, transformation, and finally realizing my worth, while trying to break out of the people-pleasing mentality most of us 30 something women were raised with. I've grown tremendously and I find myself being called to share my journey, in hopes of inspiring others to make the hard choices, take the lessons, and don't apologize for being and loving yourself.
When I was a little girl, hell, even a year and a half ago, I never thought to myself, "I'm going to start an e-commerce business and sell tank tops on the internet". I've always been successful in my corporate career and to this day, I still love and enjoy it, but I needed more.
I made the difficult choice two and a half years ago to end my marriage, a 15-year relationship, my only relationship to that point. I was lucky enough to have been sent someone who was able to show me that I was settling for much less than I deserved. Someone who saw and understood the real me, not the image I had been taught to portray to the outside world. This person gave me the courage and confidence to re-evaluate my life (which is a pretty big deal when you were raised to not ask questions). Having two young children at the time, I went back and forth between guilt and knowing in my bones I had to make a change. At that point, I reached out to a therapist and my healing and self-discovery journey began.
I don't know about y'all, but sarcasm and humor have always served as coping mechanisms for me. I've been in some insane situations over the last several years, dating for the first time ever, healing from a breakup with the only person I've ever been vulnerable with, dealing with early-adulthood trauma, learning how to co-parent, supporting a struggling co-parent, and being a single-mom to two young children. It sounds cliche, but I've laughed, cried, broken down, been angry, sad, and the happiest and I've ever been. My "designs", if you can call them that, are a reflection of just that, with a little humor and sarcasm mixed in. They are not cohesive or perfectly organized, because this journey and our emotions don't work that way. I hope you will find something from my tiny collection that will make you laugh, or feel like a boss, or give you strength on the hard days, because I know somedays we need that reminder when we look in the mirror.
If you've made all the way through this post and have a story to share or questions for me, please feel free to reach out to me at holly@rivandrydesigns.com or comment below.
